well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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