I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
People in love make me want to vomit
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
