Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Randomize
