What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
