Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
