Hey man sorry I got all grabby
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize