it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
