Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
