So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize