so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
