I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize