Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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