He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
