I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize