i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
