check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Buhtt sex?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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