ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
