And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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