I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize