Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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