Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Randomize