I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
