we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
