so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
