I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
two words...techno handjob
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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