Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
