Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm both gender and math confused
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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