Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize