do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
