Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
