he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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