we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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