Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
It's blow job season.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
