Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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