it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
