How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
