If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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