idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Randomize
