i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize