Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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