Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize