Whoa Z and x make the same sound
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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