At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Me too!
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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