Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
