Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
