dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
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