the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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