I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
