you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Randomize
