so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
im six kinds of drunk right now
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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