no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
