Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
